• Helping women live happier personal and professional lives

My Good Girl story

My passion for working as a Women’s Counsellor stems from my own experiences and also through the shared experiences of many women I’ve talked to over the past 15 years.

Looking back on my own life I see it unfolding in stages. I have come to identify these stages as MyDreamMy Reality and Waking Up.

My Dream

Growing up I learned I ‘should’ be a good girl and do what I’m told.
My reward for being a good girl:
When I grew up Mr. Right would find me, and provide a perfect life of happy ever after. I was a very good girl and couldn’t wait to grow up.

My Reality

By my late 20’s I was a divorced single mother, unhappy, in a dead end job and in another unhealthy relationship. I felt disillusioned; this was not the life I expected. I wondered what I had done wrong and thought I wasn’t ‘good enough’ to have my ‘perfect’ life.

Life felt very painful and I desperately wanted change.

Waking Up

In my mid 30’s I discovered the ‘good girl’ inside of me. I became aware of the messages I received while growing up about how I ‘should’ be if I wanted to be happy. I was taught to play a supporting role, to make others happy, do as I was told and not bring attention to myself. I was told that my main value was to find a good man who would marry me.

You mean it's not just me?

The 'should' messages that I had internalized held me back from being myself and living a fulfilling and happy life. From working with so many women over the years, I have found that each one of us has our own unique set of messages that we've carried with us throughout our lives. For me, I can see how not being myself held me back. I experienced social anxiety, lacked confidence in myself and sought love, approval and acceptance from others. I stayed in jobs that I didn’t enjoy and remained in unfulfilling relationships because I was afraid to make mistakes, and afraid to be alone.

Life became unbearably painful.

This is when I realized I was living a false life.

It became clear that if I wanted a happy life I needed to stop waiting for someone to provide that for me.  It was my responsibility to transform my life.

The good girl said NO MORE.

Breaking Free 

I started challenging the 'should' messages and discovered myself buried underneath.

After 8 years of living away from Canada I returned. I continued my ‘breaking free’ process by talking to other women. I learned that many women from different age groups also experience unhappiness, don’t know who they are; are disillusioned with love relationships and feel 'stuck' both personally and professionally.

I became deeply inspired to help women break free as I have done so they do not have to continue suffering a moment longer.

The Person and Counsellor I am Today

  • I have faced and overcome many challenges to give up my “good girl” ways and today my life is very different.
  • I am fulfilling my life purpose as a Women’s Counsellor helping women be themselves and live happier lives.
  • I am happier in my own skin and engaged in living every day with purposeful actions. I do what I love doing, say 'yes' only when I really mean it, and a have a healthy relationship that supports the real me.

I still enjoy being the 'good girl' when I 'choose' to do the things I need to do for family, friends and community, but now I take care of my own needs first.

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